


Wearing Him Down

by NobodyOfficial



Category: Black-ish (TV), In the Heights - Miranda
Genre: Awkward, First Meeting, Fluff, Johsnavi, M/M, benny teases him, i guess, johan basically wears him down, lots of coffee, my boy is slow, sonny and vanessa are rays of sunshine, very slights angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 14:46:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10811151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NobodyOfficial/pseuds/NobodyOfficial
Summary: Every city in the world seems stifling to Johan, but in New York, one of the busiest cities in the world, he finds someone who makes it seem less so. Oh, and their meddlesome family and friends, too.





	Wearing Him Down

**Author's Note:**

> *quietly paddling kayak behind the canoe* IF I'M SUPER QUIET THEY WON'T NOTICE ME AND I CAN STAY
> 
> Guess who's back? This trash! This trash who has exams! Guess who's screwed? C'est moi!
> 
> I'm trying SUPER hard not to contradict anyone's headcanons, since this fandom is so small, but I'm pretty sure everyone has a different headcanon on how they met, so this should be alright. 
> 
> My one Spanish sentence is technically correct, but I dunno about the grammar, I've never had a proper Spanish lesson. I know the French would make better grammatical sense in a different order but I'm going on the basis that Usnavi does not know this.
> 
> So, please tolerate ;)

It was the type of shop Johan would've described as eclectic or bohemian. Of course, he didn't know how deeply this would offend the owner as he stood outside the door for the first time. It was just after midday, early for Johan, and in an attempt to find some slightly less... Commercial breakfast coffee, he had found himself more than a little out of his way.

New York wasn't Johan's usual choice of travel destination, he wasn't interested in business or finance or retail, but he'd decided he was ready for a change. Johan had visited countless small towns, European villages, homey communities, searching for a place that would make him feel at home. But each one left him as empty as when he arrived. So, in desperation, Johan had decided to try something different.

So far the city has evoked no real emotion in him, but Johan had nowhere else to go. He saw no harm in sticking around for a few more days before returning to California, where he'd have to explain to everyone why yet another place just didn't quite suit him.

Johan entered the bodega. Inside it was tidy and organised, but in a chaotic way. Condoms hung next to liquorice sticks. Wine bottles shared a fridge with Capri suns. A metal fan battled for space with a pile of today's newspapers. And Johan loved it.

A cap emerged from behind the counter, followed by the face of a slightly flustered Dominican man. He looked Johan up and down, looked back to whatever was beneath the counter, then stood up and smiled warmly.

"Hey! Can I help you?" He wiped his hands on a towel, then picked up a note pad and pen. Johan stared. "¿Te puedo ayudar?" This only made Johan's head spin more. He wasn't quick or witty and sometimes his brain moved so slowly hours could pass without his noticing, but Johan always, always had something to say. Not now though. Now he simply watched, stock still, as the shop keeper tried his hand at some basic ASL, offered Johan his notepad, asked him if he was lost. "Umm... Vous parlez français?" He offered eventually, a little uncertain. That was the final straw. Johan's knees were weak. This guy was hot.

"Sorry," Johan finally managed to choke out. "Can I get a tall, non-fat latte with soy milk, caramel drizzle and chocolate sauce, decaf?" The shopkeeper's eyes widened as he stared at Johan in horror. Johan smiled back. He'd been told he looked very attractive when he smiled. Mostly by his mom, but that was something.

"You can have a coffee," he told Johan uncertainly. "With milk."

Johan was a little put out at this, but he didn't want to leave. "Oh, yeah, that's fine too," he mumbled.

The shopkeeper nodded, then tilted his head towards the small kitchen behind him. "I just need to... Yeah." He shuffled backwards, bumped in to the counter, then disappeared in to the kitchen. Johan sighed and placed a hand over his heart, which was pounding ferociously. He smiled to himself, like a lovestruck dame in a movie. Ever since he was young Johan had had the habit of falling deeply, ridiculously in love with people for roughly five minutes. As far as he was concerned, this wasn't any different, just a passing crush on a sweet shopkeeper. Of course, he was going to enjoy the wonderful, light feeling while it lasted.

A few moments later the shopkeeper returned with a cardboard cup and placed it on the counter. He carefully looked Johan over once more before saying, "That's $2.70, please."

"Oh." As Johan dug around in his pocket for his wallet he looked around the store once more. He took in the till, adorned with pictures of the shopkeeper with his friends and family. Someone who was probably his girlfriend. Johan handed over the $2.70 and, despite the fact that he was running low on cash, shoved a handful of dollar notes in to the tip jar. He allowed their finger tips to brush as he took his coffee. "Thanks."

Johan reached the door before the shopkeeper called, "Wait!" His heart fluttered as he turned around. Two small packets were being held out to him. "You might want some sugar. We make it strong around here."

"Ah, thanks." Johan didn't want the sugar, but he did think about that shopkeeper for the rest of the day. Well, what was left of the day.

~

"He was a real entitled kid, ya know? Preppy. Loud. Weird. Beautiful hair. Gorgeous eyes. Real annoying."

"If you hate him so much how come you've been talking about him for the past five minutes?" Benny chuckled.

"What?" Usnavi's eyes darted to the clock. "Huh, yeah. Sorry."

They both looked up as the door opened and a tall man with a ponytail walked in. Benny rolled his eyes at Usnavi, seeming to say 'this guy, right?' Usnavi's blush deepened.

"Oh hey!" The man's face brightened when he saw Usnavi. "Could I get a, umm... Coffee. With milk? Please?"

"Sure," Usnavi nodded, heading in to the kitchen.

Benny looked between Usnavi and this man, then allowed his mouth to fall open. "Oooh," he grinned, jumping up excitedly. "Oooh man!" He scrambled in to the kitchen, grabbing Usnavi by the shoulders. "Man, tell me that's preppy California guy." His grin seemed to split his face, his grip on Usnavi showing his eager excitement.

"Yeah, yeah. That's him," Usnavi said nonchalantly.

"Wow, what an ass!" Usnavi was thinking the same, only in a different context. Benny let go of him, much to his relief, and peered back in to the shop. The man was looking down at his phone. He bounded back in to the kitchen. "Usnavi he's wearing sandals with pants! And a tank top with a cardigan! You couldn't make this stuff up!"

"Yesterday he was wearing a ripped sweater I'm sure he paid actual money for," Usnavi added. He failed to add how nice that sweater had looked. Honestly the man exuded so much confidence Usnavi thought he'd look good in anything. There had been that incredibly awkward staring match when they first met, in which the man had made a total fool out of Usnavi, so all logic told him he should hate the guy. Everything about the guy should've driven Usnavi crazy, but instead he just made him smile.

"I'm gonna go talk to him!" Benny exploded, smacking Usnavi lightly on the arm. He paused to drop three dollars on the counter. "Lemme grab a Milky Way."

Usnavi put the lid on the coffee he was making, then sauntered over to the door to watch Benny. Benny eyed the Californian, then sat down and took a rather aggressive bite of his Milky Way. "So," he swallowed with equal vigour, "What are you doing around here?"

The man looked up to see who had spoken, startled slightly when he saw Benny, then replied, "I just like to travel."

"Where'd you pick your sandals up? Join the Roman army?" Benny grinned. The man frowned, clearly processing what had just been said to him. Usnavi watched the cogs turn in his brain, before he gasped theatrically.

"Actually I'll have you know these sandals were made by some stoners who live in the same park as my parents, and I am now realising that is much worse that sounds." He turned his attention back to his phone, unable to meet Benny's gaze.

"Ah, sorry." Benny held his hands up. "What d'you do then? Your job make you move around a lot?"

"We-ell, I'd probably say I'm between jobs right now. I taught for a while. I do a lot of spoken word poetry back in California." He seemed very proud of this, but Benny scoffed.

"Yeah, what's that about?" He laughed.

"Allow me to demonstrate." The man stood up tall and cleared his throat, then began, "My name is Johan-"

"No!" Benny interrupted. "That's already too hippy for me, I'm out." He got up to leave.

"Hey! I'm not a hippy!" Johan protested. "I'm just spiritual. And I care about the environment." He looked around in a lame attempt to find an insult to throw back. This took him until Benny was halfway out the door. "Milky Ways have too much sugar to be eating them for breakfast!"

"It's only breakfast time in California!" Benny shot back. "Hey Usnavi!" Usnavi immediately jumped back from the door. "I see you lurking, grab me another Milky Way so I can eat it in front of your sugar free friend over here, show him what he's missing." He took a calm step towards Johan, who flinched.

As Usnavi made his way back behind the counter Johan hurriedly slammed a five dollar note down, took his coffee with a slightly panicked 'thank you' then bolted for the door. Usnavi scowled at Benny. "Dude! You scared him away!"

"Hey, I'm sure plenty of other hippies will mistake your bodega for a 'spiritual cafe'. Anyway, dude's so slow it'll take him a year to find his way to a Starbucks." It didn't help Johan's situation that he was still stood on the sidewalk, trying to figure out where he was. "What an idiot," Benny mused, retiring to his seat at the counter.

"Yeah," Usnavi signed, resting his chin in his hand and staring after Johan.

~

Despite his run in with Usnavi's friend yesterday, Johan still returned to the bodega. The thought of how much more full fat milk he'd have to consume if he kept this up made Johan a little uncomfortable, but a warm, heavy feeling in his chest begged him to return. Unlike his usual five minute crushes, which were short-lived and intense, Johan had found himself thinking about Usnavi intermittently throughout the next day, each time lighting his face up with a smile. When he'd woken up that morning he found the first thought in his mind was of Usnavi. Usually his first thought was of yoga or breakfast smoothies, so that was a new sensation.

"Hey!" Usnavi gave a little, awkward wave as Johan entered the bodega. "It's Johan, right?"

"Oh." Johan blushed as Usnavi said his name. It sounded good. Sweet. Innocent. Plus, people didn't usually make much of an effort with his name; he'd been called Joanne one time too many in middle school. "Yeah, yeah. And you're Usnavi? That's a cool name."

"Yeah, I am. Look, I'm sorry about Benny yesterday. He's a real nice guy but fixed in his beliefs."

"It's fine," Johan said. In reality he'd shown up considerably later so as to avoid seeing Benny again.

"So, d'you want a coffee?" Usnavi asked. "I bought some soy milk too, if you like."

Was that for him? No, that was silly. Usnavi probably made around a hundred coffees a day, it was a business decision, nothing more.

"Benny said it was stupid of me, to do that for just one customer," Usnavi continued, "But... I wanted to. You could've gone to any hipster coffee shop for your fancy coffee, and you didn't."

"Well, I really appreciate it," Johan said, a little unsure about the sentiment Usnavi was trying to display. "Full fat milk is just bad news."

"Well... Well... You could drink a lot of full fat milk," Usnavi spluttered, before knocking over a stack of newspapers and barging through to the kitchen. Johan placed the papers back on the counter and stared, perplexed, at the door Usnavi had just left through. He had either just called him fat or attractive, and although Johan favoured the latter (he knew he was ripped) there was still doubt in his mind. He wanted Usnavi to find him attractive. After Benny's comments yesterday he'd even made an effort with his fashion choices, switching out his usual 'natural but really cost a few hundred dollars' look for pumps, yoga pants, and a hoodie.

Usnavi returned with the coffee. "On the house," he said. "It's experimental coffee."

"Oh, wow, thanks." Johan took a sip. "Caramel?"

"Um, yeah." Usnavi shuffled his feet, looking up at Johan. "You said you wanted some."

"Thanks." Johan didn't know what to do now. He didn't want to leave, plus it felt rude to go after Usnavi had made such an effort with his coffee. He looked again at the pictures he had noticed during his first visit. "I like your pictures," he told Usnavi, trying not to sound too creepy. "Gives your shop a real homey feel. Family business and stuff."

"Ah, thanks." Usnavi rubbed his eyes quickly, then turned his attention to the pictures. "A lot of people I know have kind of drifted away, I like to keep a reminder of them. This," he picked up a picture of a toddler, "Is Benny's daughter, the guy you met yesterday. And this," he excitedly grabbed another picture, "Is my cousin Sonny. He's in college just now, I'm such a proud cousin."

Johan wanted to ask about the picture of Usnavi and the girl, if she was his girlfriend, if she was even around anymore, but instead he pointed to a picture of a very young Usnavi with an older lady. "Who's this?"

"Oh." Usnavi paused for a moment, his eyes a little misty again. "She was my abuela. Well, not really my abuela, but after my parents died she raised me."

'Was' my abuela. Not only had Johan found a picture of someone close to Usnavi who had died, but he'd also managed to remind him of his parents' death. All in the space of five seconds. Good job Johan. "I'm sorry," he said simply.

"It's fine," Usnavi began, then the door opened and more customers stepped in.

"Sorry, I should go," Johan murmured, backing away. "Thanks for the coffee."

~

Usnavi glowed with pride as Sonny talked about college. Nothing made him happier than the thought that he'd been able to send his vibrant, intelligent little cousin to school. Sonny was having an amazing time studying social politics, plus he got to explore an area outside of The Heights.

"So cuz, what about you? What've I missed in the barrio?" Sonny asked.

"Nothing much," Usnavi said truthfully. He felt like nothing much had been happening for a while now, except, "This crazy Californian dude came in and had a fight with Benny. He wore sandals."

"Wow, your life is cra-azy," Sonny smirked, rolling his eyes.

"Stick around, you can meet him," Usnavi offered. "He usually comes in about now."

"In this weather?" Sonny gestured to the pouring rain outside. "You'll be lucky if that sheltered sandal-wearer leaves his hotel room."

Sonny was wrong. Several minutes later a dripping wet, windswept Johan stumbled in to the bodega. "Hey," he called from the door mat. "Ima stay here so I don't get your store wet." His curls were swept back with rain and his soaked clothes clung tightly to his body. Usnavi averted his gaze.

He said, "No, no, don't worry. Come in, I'll get you a towel." Then, quieter, "Sonny, get him a towel."

"I'm not taking orders from you once I have a degree, y'know?" He huffed, stalking off.

"It's awful weather, what made you come?" Usnavi asked, lifting a stool over the counter for Johan to sit on.

"Eh, it's just some rain. We used to get some shit weather back in France, but kids still came to school, so I still had to get up." Johan looked deeply displeased at the prospect of getting up. Usnavi suspected this time of the afternoon really was breakfast time for Johan.

"You used to be a teacher?" Maybe Benny had misjudged his intellect. "That's..." Don't say cute, don't say cute, Usnavi's thoughts interrupted, "Hot." Damnit. That was worse! It was the only other word circulating in his mind at that moment.

"Actually, it was quite cold most of the time," Johan mused. Or maybe Benny was right.

Sonny bounded back in to the room and thrust a towel in to Johan's hands. "Boy!" He exclaimed. "You are slow!" Johan didn't seem offended until a couple of seconds later. Sonny slid back over the counter and leaned in close to Usnavi. "Cuz! You like him!"

Johan began to dry his hair, towelling it until it stuck out around his head like a cloud. Usnavi chuckled.

"Ay! Usnavi, are you listening? No, you're watching this pretty boy play with his hair!" It was true; as Sonny spoke Usnavi was captivated by Johan pulling his hair in to a messy ponytail. "Man, you had a better chance with Vanessa! This guy's all about travel and spending money and shit. You're not like that."

Sonny had a point, Usnavi thought. Johan liked to move around, he clearly never kept a steady job. He was wasteful and entitled. But something made Usnavi excited to see him each day. He was also endearing and sweet. And hot.

Usnavi got up to make Johan's coffee, leaving him with Sonny. When he returned they were talking animatedly about college. "English is actually the worst," Johan laughed. "I only really liked the poetry, and the reading, and the essay writing. Oh, that's most of it."

"You in to social politics much? It's a pretty hippy thing." Sonny grinned cheekily.

"Yeah, I guess. Like knitting groups and animal rescue?"

Sonny burst out laughing, leaving Johan a little bewildered. "Nah, I think we're two very different people."

Usnavi passed Johan his coffee, but waved him away when he reached for his wallet. "No worries. On the house." Much to Usnavi's horror Sonny's eyes widened and he grabbed his cousin.

"One second," he called over his shoulder as he dragged Usnavi in to the kitchen. Then, in a quiet but harsh voice, "Damn cuz! You really like this guy! You like him!" Usnavi opened his mouth to reply, but just left it hanging open in shock. "I thought you were just crushing but you like him! You like him like you liked Vanessa and you really liked Vanessa and you liked liking Vanessa!"

Usnavi struggled to form a coherent response. Sonny had lost him at the second 'like'. "I... I... He's alright. Anyway, he'll be leaving soon, it's nothing, nothing. He's probably already gone." Before he could get lectured any further, Usnavi stepped past Sonny and back in to the shop. Johan was still there, awkwardly looking around, one hand shoved in his pocket. He smiled gleefully when he saw Usnavi.

"I was just wondering," he said softly, "If you could tell me a bit about what there is to do in New York, y'know, when it rains." He finally sat down at the counter. Usnavi sat opposite him.

"Well, I could probably tell you a few things."

From behind the kitchen door Sonny giggled madly.

~

Johan yawned and sleepily rubbed his eyes. It was before midday, not within Johan's usual waking hours, but he wanted to make an effort for Usnavi. His hair was already a mess after yesterday's run in with the storm, so he'd tied it up in a scarf, something he didn't consider his best look. Yesterday Usnavi had talked with him for hours about New York, and the Dominican Republic, and The Heights, and his childhood. In return he'd listened to Johan talk about France and his own childhood in California, with only minimal teasing.

Tucking a flyaway tendril under his scarf, Johan eagerly pushed in to the store, only to pull up short. Usnavi was there. And Benny. And Sonny. And that pretty girl Johan had assumed to be Usnavi's girlfriend. So what? It's not like he liked Usnavi or anything. Not like he wanted Usnavi to like him. Or love him. He didn't participate in that corporate shit. Still, something made him hang back, wave awkwardly from the door.

"Yo! Californian bird whisperer! What's up?" Sonny yelled happily, slipping off the counter to greet Johan.

Benny simply smirked smugly from the counter. "Well, look who's back. Mr preppy soy latte. Good to see you."

Johan acknowledged the offensive greeting with a nod, but he couldn't stop staring at Usnavi, and the animated conversation he was having with that girl. He felt stupid. There was plenty of love in the world to go around, that's what his parents always said, what did it matter if Usnavi didn't like him?

Everything.

When Usnavi caught sight of Johan he motioned for Benny to shut up, then cheerily waved him over. "Hey," he blushed. "This," a hand placed on the girl's shoulder, "Is Vanessa, one of my oldest friends."

At the word 'friend' Johan visibly relaxed, but he was still nervous under the judgemental gaze of Benny. He thought he got on quite well with Sonny, even if he jested a bit, but Benny reminded him of Dre; he thought Johan was a waste of space.

Usnavi got up to make Johan a coffee, leaving in the company of his friends. "What happened to your hair, little red riding hood?" Benny called as soon as he was out of earshot.

"Communism called, they want their flag back!" Sonny exploded, enthusiastically high-fiving Benny.

Vanessa jumped to Johan's defence. "Come on guys, leave him alone. You don't know what it's like to have a bad hair day, you barely have any hair!" The boys gasped in mock offence. Johan decided he liked Vanessa.

As they waited for Usnavi to return, the tension of having an unfamiliar person join the group finally settling in, Johan mulled over his feelings. In a few months he'd leave New York, then he'd never see Usnavi again. The thought repulsed him. He wanted to see Usnavi every morning when he woke up. Not for coffee, although he did make good coffee, but just to talk. Laugh. Share things with. He looked around at the people Usnavi had decided to fill his life with; he wouldn't want to do that with him.

The first thing he said to Usnavi when he returned was, "You don't like me, do you?" It was said softly, with insecurity, meant only for Usnavi to hear. For a moment Johan wondered if he'd even uttered it aloud. But the shocked look on Usnavi's face confirmed that he had. "It's alright, it's ok!" Johan gushed quickly. "No one ever really does. I just thought it would be best if, if, y'know..." He fumbled for the right words, panic building with ever passing second. "Rather than later." Johan allowed a five dollar note to drift to the counter, then he turned and hurried out of the store. That couldn't possibly have gone worse.

Resisting the urge to look back, to have one last glance at the only place he'd ever felt at home, Johan slunk away in to the maze that was New York.

"Wait!" He had barely turned the corner when someone stopped him. Vanessa. "Wait! Hey! You!" She hurried up to him. "Johan." Her eyes were pleading. "Usnavi really likes you. He likes you! And Usnavi is the sweetest, kindest, most loving man in the world, he doesn't love lightly. I should've realised that. You deserve to know that. He's so awkward around you because he likes you. His friends tease you because they know he likes you. Please."

Johan felt deeply embarrassed. As usual, he'd got scared and run away. Vanessa stood for a moment, watching him, judging him, then she turned, defeated, and walked away. Johan's heart pounded harder. He'd made a fool of himself. He should just turn and leave. Turn and leave. Or... Pushing off from the wall, he sprinted back to the bodega. He arrived out of breath, not from running but from fear, and crashed through the doors. "Usnavi I like you!" He exclaimed. Usnavi looked up, his mouth slightly agape. Johan hurriedly pressed on. "I like you and I'm sorry. I'm not like your friends. I'm not like your family. Hell, I'm not even the kind of person you'd call an acquaintance, but I like you!"

All eyes were on Johan. He blushed. Vanessa giggled. He hoped Usnavi would say something soon. Anything. He'd even taken an 'I hate you' right now.

"I really like you." It was spoken softly and to the counter, but Johan knew it was directed at him. Benny rolled his eyes, and Sonny appeared to do a mini fist pump. Usnavi gazed straight in to Johan's eyes, smiled sweetly, then said, "I don't give free to coffee to anyone."

Johan dropped his shoulders, which had been hunched and defensive, and laughed. Usnavi laughed too, more from nerves than anything else. Vanessa and Sonny shared loaded glances across the room.

"I have to work now," Usnavi started, "But later-"

"Oh man!" Benny groaned. "No! No! Sonny can work." He pointed at Sonny. "Work! You should go out with this guy, right now." Then, softly and with a slightly melancholy glance at Vanessa, "Don't make the same mistake twice."

As his friends began another heated conversation, Usnavi slipped out from behind the counter and joined Johan outside. This time, upon leaving the bodega, Johan found the warm sense of home he felt in there came with him. Looking at Usnavi, he began to wonder if that's where he'd been going wrong: home was a person, not a place.

"Want to see a park?" Usnavi offered.

"You have parks here?"

"Yeah," he smiled. "But they're hidden behind the skyscrapers. Like secret parks."

"I'd love to see a secret park." Johan sighed happily. New York wasn't bad. With Usnavi beside him the streets seemed wider and the buildings less suffocating and the people they passed on the streets more friendly. New York seemed like a good place to stay.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo... How much did that suck, mes amis? Thank you for reading. My super long tumblr URL is everyonewholovesmehasdied and it's still pretty new so feel free to discuss anything with me or look at my terrible post!
> 
> I've been singing Hello! From Book of Mormon for like a week now this is literally the opposite of problem until you're taking a test and I HAVE A FREE BOOK WRITTEN BY JESUS


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